What If?

So Oleesia and I were talking about church and all that Wednesday afternoon. I showed her a poem her dad posted on his Facebook page and we decided to talk about it. It's titled "What If?" by Ganga White. It's lovely and simple and thought provoking. I'll share it with you and share some of things Oleesia and I talked about as we read the poem together. Here goes:

What If?

What if our religion was each other?

If our practice was our life?

If prayer was our words?

What if the Temple was the Earth?

If forests were our church?

If holy water - the rivers, lakes and oceans?

What if meditation was our relationships?

If the Teacher was life?

If wisdom was self-knowledge?

If love was the center of our being

Thank you to the author. This is beautiful and it is accurate. Because what you question is reality.

Our religion is each other. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I know this. Our purpose on this earth is to care for one another, to serve, to love, to care for one another. In essence, our religion is each other.

Our practice is our life. Heavenly Father gave us this mortal life as a test, a practice for the eternities. We get to practice, make mistakes, fix them and start over to do better. It's on going and ever evolving to make us the best we can be.

Prayer is our words. With every word we speak, we can hurt or help. We speak to one another and can speak the words of Truth, what God would have us speak or we can speak lies and wound. They are our prayers. God is listening to us ALL. THE. TIME. So choose your words carefully. Are they meant to hurt or heal?

The Temple is the Earth. This is the world Heavenly Father has built for us. It is a temple, just as our homes are temples. Our bodies are temples. Then there are the buildings we call temples. Any place that allows God and the Spirit to be welcome and reside is a temple.

Forests are our church. We can pray to God, worship Him where ever. In a forest, on a lake, in the middle of the ocean. As long as we look to God, we make a church where we are. Forests included.

Water is holy. The springs, streams, creeks, rivers, ponds, lakes, seas, oceans. They are the water of Life. Jesus Christ was baptized in a river. Water is essential to our salvation.

Meditation is our relationships, if you're caring correctly. To meditate is the act of thinking deeply and focusing one's mind for a period of time. If your relationships are handled as meditation, your focus is solely on them, building them up and thinking deeply on them as much as possible to make them important.

The Teacher is Life. Read the Holy Bible, it's in there. Jesus Christ is the Teacher and through Him is Life Eternal. Pure and simple.

Wisdom is self-knowledge. As we learn and grow wise, we gain self-knowledge and what we are meant to do in this life. We grow closer to Heavenly Father and gain knowledge about what His plan is for us in the life.

Love is the center of our being. If we follow the commandments, then we love one another as we've been commanded. We find love in all things, hope in all things.

This poem couldn't be more true.

A Modest View

So I've been sitting on this topic for quite some time. It's been rolling around in my head like a loose marble.

Yup, I said it! There's a marble loose in my head. It's not lost though so no worries.

Anyway, I've heard many a high school and college girl say, "Modest is hottest!" with pride. And perhaps they should, but isn't that something of an oxymoron? I happen to believe so.

When my, now 11-year-old daughter, was in Kindergarten, a boy in her class told her she was "hot". I explained that he thought she was cute, but it made her feel really uncomfortable. After all, she was only five at the time. Boys were weirdos (She's still right on that point!) and being told she was "hot", or even cute for that matter, by a member of the opposite sex who wasn't related to her, was just strange. After she came home the second time telling me this little guy told her she was "hot". I emailed her teacher, who intervened and explained to the youngster that it was inappropriate language for Kindergarten and it made people feel uncomfortable. It stopped.

Now, we're talking about five-year-olds here, but even now and I'm (gasp!) almost 40 and I don't want some guy to tell me I'm "hot". If it's my husband, then go ahead, but generally that's not the case. While I appreciate this person may be just trying to compliment me, there are other, not-so-crude, ways to do it. Words like: "You look nice." and "I think you're beautiful." work just as nicely and don't make me think you're trying to bed me. So when I hear "Modest is hottest", I think, "Really? Is that true?"

It's true that to be modest is a GREAT thing. I teach my girls modesty. Heck, even Muhammad Ali taught his girls modesty when they were wearing more revealing clothing. A bit his daughter Hana shared in a More Than A Hero: Muhammad Ali’s Life Lessons Through His Daughter’s Eyes about modesty: 

“When we arrived, the chauffer escorted my youngest sister, Laila, and me to my father’s suite. As usual, he was hiding behind the door waiting to scare us. And we exchanged as many hugs and kisses as we could possibly give in one day.

“My father then took a good look at us. He sat me down in his lap and said something I will never forget. He looked me straight in the eyes and said: ‘Hana, everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to. Where do you find diamonds? Deep down in the ground, covered and protected. Where do you find pearls? Deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell. Where do you find gold? Way down and in the mine, covered over with layers and layers of rock. You’ve got to work hard to get them.’

“He looked at me again with serious eyes and said, ‘Your body is sacred. You’re far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too.'”

While I agree with what Mr. Ali is explaining to his daughters, I think there's more to modesty than just our exterior appearance.

In the "For the Strength of Youth" pamphlet from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, there are multiple topics that could cover modesty. Topics such as the obvious Dress and Appearance, but what about these others? Dating, Entertainment and Media, Friends, Sexual Purity, Language, and Physical and Emotional Health.

Modesty comes down to thoughts, actions, demeanor, body language, tone of voice, and, of course, dress.

Do we want our children listening to songs like "99 Problems" and "Blurred Lines"? Um, no.

Do we want our children to have some romanticized notion that relationships like the movie "Friends with Benefits" work out? I don't because it doesn't.

I would encourage us all to help our children to keep their minds innocent and pure by thinking about good things: school, sports, friendships, family; and not what a member of the opposite sex may look like with their clothes off or what it would be like to kiss him/her.

I try to teach my girls the reason we dress more conservatively is because when they get older, they want a person to like them for how nice, smart, athletic, funny they are, how good of a friend they are, how well they treat other people. Not because they're cute or "hot". I want all the amazing qualities I see in my daughters to be the reason some boy wants to take her on a date and not just her good looks.

I encourage my girls to be friends with girls and boys alike. One of my big girl's best friends is a boy and they love the same book series, so much so they dressed up like characters from the books for last Halloween and they had a GREAT time!

Today, men and women, boys and girls, are being bombarded with social media, movies, TV shows, music and books that blast the notions of chastity and modesty are antiquated, but I think the conservative side is just that... Conserving my children's hearts, minds, bodies, and souls for the best future they could possibly have.

And let us not forget modesty has two meanings... Not only is it about being conservative in our dress so that we're not indecent, but it also means we should be moderate or unassuming as well, such as not dressing in showy, expensive clothing. Be modest in our dress doesn't just mean cover up, but it means to not be flashy too.

Ultimately, the focus here is on looking at people for what they have on the inside because that's what counts in the end. It's not the label they have on their clothes or the length of the hemline. It's how you treat people. After all, He commanded us to love one another.

One final thought...

I go to church and I dress conservatively. Most of the people in my ward do. However, on the occasion a new face appears and they don't "blend" in because they're in jeans, pants for a woman, or something tight and skin-baring. Let's not judge. Maybe that person is just getting started on their journey and they need a friend and that friend is you. Perhaps that person doesn't have the ability to revamp their wardrobe in such a way to be conservatively dressed. Let's just follow the commandment I mentioned above by smiling at them, introducing yourself, and showing them around. Love them. You may be just what they needed.

Viewing Sacrifice

I haven't written since Mothers' Day, but I've had thoughts swirling and churning in my brain since then. I know my dad thinks I start these things and just drop them off the face of the earth. I promise I don't stop writing. They starts and stops just hang out in my head like fetuses. The thoughts aren't fully formed and aren't ready for the big, bad world. But today is different.

Today is Fast Sunday for July. To my husband that means he gets to watch NASCAR, but to me, a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, it means I should be skipping two meals and giving a fast offering. I did the latter today, but not the former. Oops! Fast Sunday also means testimonies will be borne after the sacrament has been passed. A couple of people said some things that really touched me, but I don't remember what they are. Terrible, right? I should write this stuff down then I can actually USE it later. Either way, what they had to say got me to thinking about the last couple months and my failure to write this blog, read my scriptures, or even pray most days. (I'm really NOT the best example!)

So looking back over the last couple months some things have weighed really heavily on me. #1 This whole Ordain Women & Kate Kelly thing and #2 The last two major holidays, Memorial Day and Independence Day. We're going to talk about the latter, because there have already been SO MANY blogs and opinions for and against the former that my head and heart hurt, actually physically hurt, from it, but on to these holidays.

Memorial Day is a day set aside by the United States of America's federal government to honor the memories of all those men and women that died while in service to the armed forces. Independence Day is another day set aside by the same federal government to commemorate the adoption of the Declaration of Independence, which was our countries way of declaring/demanding freedom from the Kingdom of Great Britain. A war ensued. We all know about the Revolutionary War, right? These two recent holidays got me to thinking about my own military service. They aren't for me yet people still honor veterans on those days. Why?

I began to reflect on my service in the United States Army. I was a military police officer for 5 years on active service. I was a military police officer for the Oregon Army National Guard for about 2 years then I became a quartermaster for the remaining 2 years or so. All-in-all I served nearly 10 years, but got out when I was pregnant with my eldest daughter. I had to desire to repeat the performance of my deployment to Bosnia-Herzegovina with a new "War on Terror" coming down the pipe. Basically, I chickened out. Mind you I had a child while serving on active service too, but I wanted my life to continue and I'm glad I made that choice. But that's not my problem. What did I contribute? What was my sacrifice?

I'm not like the hundreds and thousands of men and women that went to battle and never came home. I don't have a white cross in a national cemetery somewhere in the U.S. or over in Europe or elsewhere in the world. (There are 24 American burial grounds on foreign soil.) I didn't sacrifice. I didn't die.

Well, all this got me to thinking about soldiers, sailors, marines, airmen, and all those men and women who have passed on paying the ultimate sacrifice. Let me remind you, most of them were volunteers doing a job they knew could end by them losing their own life and they did it anyway. They were fighting for our freedom. Our freedom to live and breathe and worship in any way we feel appropriate that doesn't infringe on our fellow man. Back in 1776 that wasn't the case in a lot of places. Brave people stood up to tyranny and fought the good fight and sacrificed to give us those freedoms.

I know one person who isn't listed on any of the memorials, isn't buried in any cemetery, but did the EXACT SAME THING only better...

Jesus Christ.

Think about it. He fought tyranny. Tyranny from Satan. Satan would have us do his bidding, honor him, but he lost the fight. Christ fought for our freedoms too. Our freedom to choose. We have the choice to believe in Him, in Heavenly Father and we have the choice to not believe. He paid the ultimate sacrifice. He died for us. EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US. He died so we could be saved both from physical death, but spiritual death too.

Jesus Christ's sacrifice is the ULTIMATE sacrifice. What more could one ask of a person? And let me remind you, lest you'd forgotten. He VOLUNTEERED. Yup. Stepped up and knew exactly what he was getting into and did it anyway. He left in Heavenly Father's hands and kicked booty!

Christ is our perfect example of what to do, how to live, how to behave, how to act, how to treat one another. He is the answer. If you don't think He knows your pleasure, your pain, your joy, your suffering. Think again. He knows. Even better, lean on Him and He'll carry you through the trials and be there to celebrate your triumphs. ALWAYS.

What could be better?

Now not to diminish those brave men and women we honor on Memorial Day and Independence Day. Thank you so much for your sacrifice. I know you're here watching over your loved ones and trying with all your might to steer them in the right direction. You'll be together again some day.

Everyone, let's take care of each other by honoring those who sacrificed for us. Honor Heavenly Father as Christ would have done and in doing so, you honor those that have passed in the fight for our continued freedoms.

In Jesus' name.

Amen.